When everything closes in and you can't breathe; when getting out of bed feels like you're weighted down with wet clothes and each movement is in slow motion; when you have nothing to look forward to; laugh about...or nothing to love, it's time for... Chicken Zen!
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| Better than xanax |
Instead of that unhealthy caffeinated drink, try Chicken Zen. Chickens provide a pick-me-up in the morning starting with a rousing "rise and shine" crow from your rooster. Then, throughout the day, you're presented with many light exercise opportunities including pen cleaning, poo pick up, checking for eggs, feeding, fence placement and maintenance and fight referee. No more hiding under the covers for you! If your cock-a-doodling rooster doesn't rouse you, the cackling hens will and when they both are vying for the same box to lay...well, the racket can raise the dead... or despondent, whichever you are.
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| Grass and chickens - good for the soul |
Are you making too many trips to your therapist? Popping too many Xanax or topping off your wine glass more often? May I suggest an alternative? Zen - Chicken Zen. Grab your yoga mat and water bottle and set up on the grass surrounded by gently scratching hens. Soothe your inner soul with their soft clucking and observe nature's teamwork as they discover a cache of insects under matted grass and leaves. The kindness of the rooster as he discovers and shares tasty tidbits dissolves gender angst and his devotion to the ladies sets an example you men could take heed of. After observing the utter bliss chickens attain when they bathe in a small dust divot, you may consider a bath for yourself and although you may not receive as many benefits as the chickens do, at least you don't have to wait for anything to dry like at those expensive spa baths.
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| See - dinosaur-like feet |
When observing these creatures you notice that they hold an uncanny resemblance to those awesome creatures from Jurassic times - dinosaurs. Yes, their feet and everything else look just like a velociraptor - if you squint your eyes out of focus for a minute that is. But you'll see that they are a bit smarter since I
have seen chickens playing those little pianos at fairs. Witnessing the result of evolution up close and personal is an extra educational benefit you won''t soon forget.
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| Heart string tuggers at work |
Chicken Zen offers young ones...small, fluffy peeping offspring of the egg (or was it the chicken - I don't know), anyway - they truly appeal to everyone and if you are fortunate to raise them from chickhood, you will overcome attachment disorders instantaneously after nurturing a few of these darlings.
Finally, Chicken Zen will lighten your worries with laughter when you observe their excitement when supplying ordinary kitchen scraps to them. Their hasty lumbering dash across the yard will bring a smile to your face as they remind one of a clown - only smaller and with feathers. Chickens offer constant amusement that one understands only after immersing oneself in the experience of chickens.
For these reasons and others I have not mentioned, I highly recommend Chicken Zen for YOUR soul...forget the chicken soup, it only helps a cold, but the whole chicken, living and breathing has many more benefits - Chicken Zen - I guarantee it!
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| Calm and happy... |
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| All ages benefit |
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| Chicken Zen happiness * |
Pictures are not of actual participants in this program. Models have been used to protect the privacy of those that are really screwed up and need help. Chicken Zen is an alternative treatment and last resort and is not recommended for those with eating disorders since everything and its mother wants to kill and eat chickens.
*These chickens are some of the happiest chickens on earth and have been retired from public scrutiny. They are truly free to run and scratch.
